I'm sick today. Started yesterday--Sunday--about 8:30 p.m. It's awful. Jon had been sick for about two weeks, a slow, rotten, cranky kind of sick that just couldn't decide if it wanted to move on and evolve, or stay just the way it was, irritating Jon's little head off. Now it's on me, only I'm hoping I can speed things along. I've been drinking lots of water, which is helping me immensely.

Ever since I started taking my Celexa, my bathroom habits have been very rare and strange. Whenever I have to pee, it's nothing. Nothing. No matter how much water I'd drink, but then again, I'd go about 20 times in a day and just "trickle, trickle." Same with all other else--yes: "trickle, trickle" (gross, I know). I was beginning to get worried because I've been having this problem for about a month. Perhaps all the interruption came to a head and my body said, "Great! See what you did? Now we're SICK." But miraculously, I can pee normally again.

I think the meds are working though it's hard to say. I changed so much in my life at the same time I took the meds: I accepted I was depressed and needed anti-depressants; I got a new job that I love and that keeps me busy; I started focusing on myself, mainly kick-started by my need to heal my relationship with Jon; and I stopped taking birth control pills, which I had been taking for about 9 years.

That, and my sister was finally able to come home for a short vacation and whenever I see my gorgeous little sister, I just feel BETTER. I cornrowed her hair and did the most braids I've ever done in her hair: 22. They look stunning. I'm so proud of myself, in fact, that I'm going to do another friend's hair named Mel. It will be fabulous, though she thinks it may take about 22 hours to comb her hair out. Heh heh.

I apologize for being lax in my journal. I've been busy at work and still, yes, work is the only place I have web access. I'm hoping I can get home access soon and I know I've been saying that for, oh, a year or so. But it's getting close. I can feel it. I got some extra ram for my computer at home, which currently has only 96 Mb. The new ram I got, however, was a dud and now I'm in the process of sending it back and getting more. I'm hoping this happens quickly. Then I should have the proper capability to run a browser and have access at home.

I love my job, guys. It's just fantastic. I leave every day feeling accomplished, finishing tasks and talking to people and seeing kids. It makes me feel good. I do fear that I'll fail at it sometimes; that one day, I'll come in, and I won't care anymore. I don't want that to happen yet I know that it sometimes does with social workers. When it happens to me, I'm quitting. I won't let myself stay in a job that is important to people and not have the gusto to love it. I wouldn't be effective if I did that.

I'm taking some Advil sinus in the hopes I will feel better in about an hour. I hate feeling sick and awful; my throat hurts, my ears feel clogged up, and my nose just wants to explode.

This entry is full of wonderful images.

Toodles.